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Gender and sexuality are different

By Fox Fisher

Gender and sexuality are different

PHOTOGRAPH by Sharon Kilgannon, Alonglines.com

I’m most comfortable with the label genderqueer, or androgynous.

This is the most authentic ‘me’ I can explain, and I don’t regret the empathy I’ve inherited along my journey. I feel like I’ve had many lifetimes in one.

Sexuality and gender are different things, but there is that point where they meet. Like the two lines of an ‘X’. That’s why I love ‘queer ’ so much, because it’s this great umbrella term.

I think even hetero-normative people, cis-people in straight relationships can still identify as queer, and very vehemently as well. I wish people would adopt it more, because I see it as more of an accepting kind of thing. If you label yourself as queer, then it’s up to other people to investigate how you identify and what ideals you up-hold. Queer is a beingness, a sense of self in relation to the mainstream.

In the near future, perhaps we’ll discover that everyone exists somewhere on the gender and sexuality spectrum, all spread out. Like CN Lester, I believe this spectrum is more like a constellation, with each of us experiencing the ever increasing variations of passion and identity.


This is Fox's testimony in Chapter Seven (Sexuality, intimacy, relationships, finding partners, attraction, dating) of the ground-breaking Brighton Trans*formed book.

To read more intimate, heart-breaking and heart-warming stories from transgender people, click here

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This page was amended on 19/12/2014
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